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Mark Twain once expressed his disdain for the Bible by observing that the Good Book is nothing more than a spectacular collection of liars, cheats, crooks, and adulterers all of whom have one very disturbing thing in common: God LIKES them!

For Twain, the fact that God seems to have particular affection for the riff-raff of this world was reason enough to not take it seriously. And I think he was right – and wrong. Mark Twain was right in thinking that most of the Biblical stories are in fact about some of the most morally rotten people you’ll ever hope to meet, and he was correct in saying that God seems to like those kinds of people, sometimes even more than the morally upright. This happens in story after story in the Bible!  But Twain was wrong in concluding this disqualifies the Bible from being taken seriously.

In fact, it makes the Bible all the more important to read and appreciate.

Conventional worldly wisdom has it that – like many of us – God ought to love good people and not love bad people. But the Bible confronts us with two unsettling facts: first, the truth that none of us is as good as we think we are; and second, that God’s interest is not in rewarding good people and punishing bad people. No, God’s singular focus is on bringing abundant life (which is called “salvation” in the Bible) to ALL people. And the Bible tries really hard to push us away from the notion that God is the Judge Judy of the universe, sitting on the throne UP THERE looking DOWN HERE for excuses to hurl thunderbolts at us for thinking bad thoughts or doing bad things. Instead, the Bible leads us to a vision of God that is most beautifully expressed in the opening words of the prayer we call “The Lord’s Prayer”…

…Our Father…

Not my Father, not your Father, not their Father, but…OUR Father.

And think of that word “father.” Why do you suppose the Bible wants us to see God as our parent and not as the thunderbolt hurler on high? Maybe it’s because it helps us to see ourselves and others as God sees us – as God’s CHILDREN! A parent wants nothing less than the best for their children – all their children. And that’s why  the Bible is full of stories about wayward children who God never gives up on – even though others do – until God manages to guide them safely home.

Even wayward children like the crook we run into in today’s lesson from Luke 16.

This story is sometimes called “The Parable of the Dishonest Steward”. That’s a religious way of saying “The Parable of the Embezzling Business Manager.” It starts off by telling us that the owner of the company finds out his manager is stealing from him. So the owner calls the manager in and tells him he wants to audit the books. And the manager knows he’s cooked! He’s been found out! He’s been caught! So on the way back to his office, the manager’s mind is spinning, trying to figure out what he’s going to do when he gets fired.

 “I’m not strong enough to do construction,” he thinks to himself. “And I’m definitely not going to sit by the Interstate with a sign that says, ‘Will Work For Food.’” And then he comes up with another idea.

He pulls out the file listing all the people who owe money to the owner. Then he grabs his cell phone and starts calling them one by one. “You owe us a thousand. Tell you what, let’s make that 500 if you can get me a check today!” “You owe 800, let’s make that 600!” “You owe 400, but we’ll settle for 300.” And all afternoon, the debtors show up at the corporate offices to pay up their renegotiated bills. And the manager thinks to himself, “Well, at least when I lose my job I’ll have some friends out there.”

And then he waits for the axe to drop. You can imagine how the owner is going to react to what he’s done now!

But when the owner of the company finds out what the manager has done, he reacts in a rather bizarre way – he gives him a pat on the back, a raise, a promotion and a week’s vacation on the company yacht! “Great job!” the owner says, commending the crooked, embezzling, discount-giving manager.

Now I can just see the gleam in Jesus’ eye when he gets to the end of this story. His listeners probably had on their faces the same dumbfounded look you all have on yours!

“Say what? The owner REWARDS the manager? First he steals from the company. Then he unilaterally and without the owner’s permission discounts all the accounts receivable! Why would the owner reward this crook for doing such terrible things?

But Jesus never answers that question. He just lets us think about it. So let’s hold that question – about why the owner would reward the crooked manager – while we return to the end of the parable. We’ll get back to that question later.

Jesus, in this parable, encourages us to be like the manager! Now that may seem strange, but you see, here is a guy whose life is all about self-fulfillment – all about things – all about possessions – all about money. He has spent his entire career advancing his own interests, building his own wealth – even to the point of cooking the books and embezzling from his employer. And then he gets caught…and his world falls apart.

Some of us here today know what that’s like, constructing our lives on a foundation of material gain. Pursuing the career, the money, the investments, the house on the lake, the beautiful car can sometimes become more important to us than anything else. And some of us get so caught up in achieving these material goals that we start embezzling too – not from our boss usually, but often from our families – from our husband or wife, from our kids, even from our neighbors. We get so caught up in the cult of personal gain that the THINGS of life become more important than our RELATIONSHIPS.

And when the THINGS disappear, what have we got left?

“I know what I’ll do,” said the crooked manager, “so when I lose my job and all my stuff, I’ll at least have some friends who will welcome me into their homes.” And so he showed mercy to those who owed money by forgiving some of the debt, and in so doing, he made friends.

Like the Prodigal son who came to his senses, the crooked manager came to his senses. People are more important than things. Families are more important than careers. Relationships are more important than possessions.

Jesus didn’t say it like this, but a simple way to change your life for the better is to reorient your life from achieving personal gain to making…friends! This is how he put it in verse 9: “I tell you, use worldly wealth to gain friends for yourselves, so that when it is gone, you will be welcomed into the eternal dwellings.”

Make friends!

What a good way to think of what it means to live as a Christian – showing mercy to others and making friends. What a great way to think of the mission of our church – cutting people some slack, and making friends!

That’s what Jesus wants us to do!

But what about that unanswered question – the one about why would the owner applaud his dishonest manager? First he stole from the company. Then he gave away company money by discounting the receivables. What is worth applause here?

Well, here’s my theory. Maybe it’s sort of like the story I heard about a woman who attended a fundraiser for an organization that serves kids with muscular dystrophy. The place needed a swimming pool so the kids could get water therapy, and you know how expensive indoor pools are! But while the woman listened to the story, her heart was moved and she took out her checkbook and wrote a check – a check for a very LARGE amount of money. She felt so good when she gave that money away!

Her husband, on the other hand, didn’t feel so great about it! When he found out what she’d done, he became extremely angry. She hadn’t talked it over with him. He had worked overtime to earn that money. They had been saving it up for a 25th wedding anniversary trip to Europe!

“Get in the car!” he said. “We’re going down there and you’re going to make them give the money back!”

It wasn’t a happy car ride down to the Center. When they arrived, the wife spotted the director and – feeling very embarrassed – went and told him what had happened. He was devastated, but went into his office and retrieved the check. But just as he was handing the check back to the woman, a little one of “Jerry’s kids” came by in a wheelchair being pushed by his mother. She pushed the boy right up to where the husband was standing – hands on his hips and tapping his toe impatiently. And then she said to her son, “Honey, this is the man who gave all that money to help build the swimming pool!”

And the little boy took the husband’s hand and, pressing it against his cheek, smiled a crooked little smile and said, “Thank you!.”

And the husband couldn’t help but say…

…”You’re welcome.”

Then the husband took out his own checkbook and wrote an even bigger check.

How do you suppose all those debtors felt about the owner of the company that showed them mercy and forgave their debt? I’ll bet they thought he was the most loving and generous man they ever met.

And he wasn’t about to argue with that!

You see, when you and I show mercy and kindness and love to others, it reflects upon the Owner of the divine enterprise of which we are a part.

So as this new week begins, go and make friends. Put people ahead of possessions, and relationships ahead of personal gain. Cut people some slack! Show mercy! Love generously!

And give God a good reputation!